Life as a New Mom

A first-time mom adjusting to her new everything

Is lying about personal business to a near-stranger a bad lie?

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I am inclined to say no, just for the record.  But then, I’m biased, since that is exactly what I did today for the first time at work.

I work with instructors and students, so there are two very different relationship dynamics.  With the instructors, I feel a peer-to-peer rapport and we can do things among ourselves because there’s no power difference in the relationship.  Students, on the other hand, are usually people I’m acquainted with less often, more superficially, and because I am staff, there’s more “power” on my side of the relationship since I am responsible for certain aspects of their education.

That being the case, there are things I don’t feel comfortable sharing with students.  Things I don’t want to discuss with students, regardless of if I need to share it or not.  My reproductive state is one of those things.

Fortunately, I just started my 6th month and I still don’t really show until the evenings (weird, I know).  I wear blazers to work, so it’s been hiding what little there is well, and aside from staff I’ve told, no one has really noticed yet.  I suspect that’s as much due to another woman being due this past week, and yet another who is due the day before I, but who shows much more.  So thank you ladies, for taking the heat off me.

But today all that changed, and I lied (but not really) to a student.

The student saw me Friday evening and said she saw my “little bun.”  Since I don’t, in fact, have a “little bun”, I said no.  I knew damn well what she meant though, and that makes it sort of a lie.  I don’t feel bad.

I have no intention of discussing the intimate details of my medical conditions with any student, and plan on changing the subject once I can’t avoid talking about it any longer.  They don’t need to know, and I don’t want to share.  I just wish that society (where I work) didn’t feel so entitled to that information and expect that you’ll want to discuss your pregnancy with all and sundry.

There will probably be more on this as the summer and fall progress, but for now, I feel hopeful I’ll be afforded the dignity of being left alone.

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Author: Torra

A librarian, dog owner, tea drinker, and lover of all things unusual and literary.

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