Life as a New Mom

A first-time mom adjusting to her new everything


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Damp. Moist. Wring me out and hang me up to dry.

Dear Widget,

I see that little white cap of a tooth.  Yes, you’re 3 months.  I know, you’ve had that white cap ever since you were 5 weeks old.  But really, it’s decision time.  Either teethe the tooth already, or stop drooling.

Seriously.

It’s excessive when I hold you for one minute on my shoulder and have a wet mark the size of a kiwi, with absolutely no vomit in it.  It’s excessive when you can’t lay on the floor for 10 minutes without gagging on your own saliva.

Not only that, but it makes me sad to hear you constantly coughing because you can’t swallow the drool fast enough.

So, that being said, let’s decide to either shut off the water main or get the tooth out so the drool lightens up.  I expect your answer by end-of-business tomorrow.

Love,
Mama

P.S. – There is absolutely nothing true about the fact I want to keep typing “droll” instead of “drool”.  This situation is not droll, nor does it look to become so at any point in the future.

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I must be a terrible mother

You know all those moms out there, with the babies in outfits?  How when you go out, all the babies are looking cute in their onesies and pants and hats and all the other crap?

Mine doesn’t.  I don’t dress my baby in outfits.  Some days I barely dress him at all.

The whole truth is that for the first month of his life, he wore long-sleeve side snap shirts.  No pants, just shirts, because he would constantly vomit on himself and we needed to change his clothes 4 times a day and pants didn’t fit.  Now, all he wears are zip-up sleep and play coveralls.  No snaps here, because I don’t have time to deal with fastening them all.  No joke, I can’t be bothered with snaps because they take too much time.

I have only twice put my son in a onesie.  It’s too much effort to put it on over his head.  And pants still don’t fit him right, because he’s 23 inches long, and barely 11 pounds.

I keep telling myself once he’s older, like the next size up in clothes (3-6 months), I will dress him.  But today I realized that he is ready for that size, because he is long enough and the zip-up footies are getting too short.

Crap.  I mean well, and will try to start dressing him like a human.  But there are days where I can barely manage to get myself dressed, and knowing he’ll need to change outfits multiple times a day saps my will to live (with him in outfits, that is).

How do you collected and together moms manage to do this every day?  What am I missing here???


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The Early Bird gets the….hot coffee!

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This seems like a fitting topic for Fat Tuesday.

All my life, even the teen years, I have been a morning lark.  Mornings make me happy.  I remember being 5 years old, getting up with my daddy (who worked retail, and those shifts are crazy!) and doing Mousercise (mouse-er-size…Mickey Mouse exercise on the Disney channel) while he had breakfast.  It came on at 5am.

So why did my schedule change?  Stupid question.  It was changed by the tiny Mussolini I birthed.

More importantly, why did I allow it to take something I love?  Partly, I was sleep-deprived and I love sleep.  But once Widget evened out a bit there was no excuse.  I’d get up, feed him, change him if needed, feed the dog, make my husband’s lunch, and go back to bed.  I’d get maybe one hour extra of sleep, and not want to wake up.  When I finally got my feet to hit the floor again, I was in a terrible mood and it hung around for a few hours.

There was no reason for that.  I protest.

So I decided on an experiment, which I’ve decided this morning to make a permanent change.  I’ll still get up, feed Widget, etc.  But I’m not going back to bed.  I’m just going to stay up.  I can get my Internet fix in, hopefully write more consistently now, and have a HOT BEVERAGE.

Seriously.  Hot coffee or tea, with a 2 month old.  WINNING.

As an aside, this change has done wonders for my morale.  It’s given me something back.  Time just for me, and that’s so incredibly important.  Yet it’s the easiest thing in the world to miss noticing you miss until you have it back again.  Having the hour, or hour and half, for being alone and doing whatever I like…how freeing.  Mornings are a gift.  What’s yours?


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Things I never expected

  • Changing my shirt in the middle of night because Widget vomited down the inside of my bra
  • Doing everything one-handed because Widget does not like being alone
  • Having massive (for me) boobs that aren’t as much fun as I’d hoped.  I blame thrush.
  • Having moments when I can’t console him, his face is the color of steak, and I wonder what I’m doing wrong as a mother
  • The hilarious cranky faces Widget makes
  • Drool all over me, ALL the time.  Seriously.  All the time.
  • How difficult baby nails are to cut and how desperate I’d be for the Claws of Pain to let go of my neck skin
  • How much Widget’s smile looks like my Daddy’s